Peerie O has been noticing that Northlink have come up with an innovative minicruise…..the all new “Slim Positive Effortless Weight Reduction” Cruise more commonly referred to using the acronym SPEWR.
Brilliant idea and will surely bring in the bookings. Simply gather a bus load of innocents, add to the bus a dash of entero bacteria and hey presto vomiting and diarrhoea for 30, lasting a minimum of 24 hrs. A total weight loss of 25 stones for the whole bus and an average 10 lbs per person gaurenteed.
There are several other benefits to this…as well as not having to feed the passengers, the weight loss means that the ferry does not burn as much fuel. It is just a matter of time before Northlink join forces with Simon King and they can start the “SPEW and VIEW” cruises. This means that all the passengers can stay out on deck to view the wildlife and get their own back on the Maalies by spewing over them as they fly past, rather than being spewed on.
It will also save Northlink the tedious job of deep cleaning the cabins, simply hose the passengers and the boat sides down before she docks!
Shetland Word of the Day – Skavel – To go over on ones ankle.